On today’s episode we have something special for all dads out there that listen to us. We had the pleasure to interview Brandie Weikle, single mother of two and the long-time parenting editor, writer and spokesperson creator of thenewfamily.com from Toronto, Canada. Dads from the perspective of a mom.
Brandie took her passion for writing and interest for the family subject to the next level by creating the blog thenewfamily.com and the 1000 families project podcast. At episode 200+ we are sure there is a ton of inspiring stories to listen to.
“We are showcasing the first person stories of people telling what family means to them until we get to 1000”
We will talk about how she started noticing the changes in the way families are portrayed on parenting media coming from her own experiences from the changes on her own family and how all of those factors made her and many other families and individuals feel badly about how different their families were from that mold.
“I could see that mainstream parenting media would cover families in this way with this sort of default voice that assumes that every family is a mom and a dad, two kids and maybe that golden retriever.”
She will shed some light on how the dad role on the family is perceived on times we live in starting from how our ancestors raised their kids up to now where we have so much variety but not so much acceptance.
“Family could look like a lot of different things. My site is about allowing people, giving them permission to celebrate their family and to believe that their family can look any way that they want to. That is up to them.”
We will once again learn the importance of being there for our kids (remember when we interviewed Ted Hicks on Episode # 37?) and family and how that is made difficult for dads because of the way most of the society still see the dad’s role on the family.
“Men have to do more pioneering in the workplace in order to take that break when they have a baby, get a little bit of parental leave. That is na issue for sure.”
For all the dads out there that are part of a man and woman kind of family we will get a great start on something called “maternal gatekeeping” and learn how we should stand up to it while also keeping up with the partner’s expectations for the family and the kids.
“I think this (maternal gatekeeping) is something that can go on that dads need to be aware of. Sometimes, just like men have their programming “you should be a breadwinner” despite it being 2016 now, women also have a lot of guilt around being the primary caregiver.”
Mainly we will learn that we should be confident as dads, helping out also as the primary caregiver and not just as a occasional babysitter that brings home the money to pay for the bills.
“They (the families) are allowed to define their family any old way that they want.”
And don’t fight about it, just be smart and cooperative to make the family work peacefully and beautifully.
Fasten your seatbelts for another amazing interview full of insight from a different point of view and perspective. Full of advice, tips and tricks and things to put in practice right now!
“I just want dads to feel encouraged to hang in there for it. Because it is worth it in the long run”
B – “Some of the richest connections are the ones that can be formed outside of the expected. My wish for dads is for them to feel confident in their role and in their importance because they are very important and no matter what your circumstances are (…) your role is important and being there in a consistent way is important.”
J – “Just keep fighting. Just because your family needs you (…) they need you.”
B – “Make sure that you are there for every possible special thin that you can be there for. Show up. Make it to the soccer game, make it to the birthday party, the Christmas concert (…) Whatever it is (…) It sucks to disappoint kids”
B – “Today we can take a bit at heart that technology can help to connect us. So if you don’t have as much time with you children as you like, skype, facetime, cell phone. Send them messages in instagram direct. Wherever they are make sure you are there and utilising those ways to connect because they really can help bridge the distance.”
J – “Keep it about the kids and do your best to overcome obstacles.”
B – “Wherever you are, look around. Go to meetup.com and see if there is a single parent group or a dads group. Something you can tap in to. There are very often parenting courses available near you and a little online research can cap you into some really great stuff both virtual and in person.”
“Let’s learn together. Let’s grow together. Let’s be dads together. Peace”
1000 Families Project – http://thenewfamily.com/tag/1000-families-project/
The New Family Blog – http://thenewfamily.com
Diversity Dad Podcast (Website coming soon and yes, that is us !) – https://www.facebook.com/diversitydad/
The Good Men Project – https://goodmenproject.com/
Brandie’s Instagram (@bran_weikle) – https://www.instagram.com/bran_weikle/